FoaD: Family Edition

Hello readers! With Thanksgiving 2006 firmly in the rear-view mirror, I want to bring you several funny moments brought to you by my family members (and maybe one or two from me). The first follows...

My Grandma came to Thanksgiving dinner this year (she's somewhat agoraphobic, so she didn't come last year), and we were all excited. My Grandma grew up in Germany, so her English isn't 100% (though I'd call her fluent). My sister suggested that Grandma should move into a house closer to our parents' house. Grandma's animated response?

"I don't want no new house!"

That's what she said!

I do not watch Ugly Betty. I do watch Grey's Anatomy, which comes on right after Ugly Betty. Last night, my fiance and I sat down to watch Grey's and we caught the last few minutes of Ugly Betty. My fiance remarked how ugly Betty actually was.

me: Well, it looks like someone crapped on her face... when she was a baby... and no one cleaned it up, so the face just grew around it.

Ed's Law #1

Reverse Murphy's Law: If you bring an umbrella, it will not rain.

Try it.

Transform and roll out

My cubicle has new guardians:







































(apologies for my crappy cameraphone pictures)

On the subject of Pigeonholing Chemicals

My fiance is very sick... she's got a nasty viral infection that resembles bronchitis. Nevertheless, she came out to vote with me last night. We had to park about 150 yards away and down the hill from the polling place, so we took the walk slowly. On the way back, we discussed the fact that I likely gave her this virus (as I was sick before her), but that it was much more mild in me.

Me: You need to get more iodine in your diet, you know, to help your immune system.
Annie: Isn't iodine salt? [She's thinking of iodised salt, invented for this very purpose.]
Me: No. Salt is salt.

At which point she laughed.

I love food

At a resturant, I was trying to decide between the quarter pounder and the 10-ounce sirloin. I finally decided:

"I'll have the quarter-ounce sirloin."