Before meeting a friend for lunch one day, his significant other sent this IM (names have been changed to protect the hilarious):
FYI for later, Schwehmdog... Dan was acting like an ass goblin last night, so I got us dinner at Chipotle and had them spike his burrito with atomic salsa. he was in extreme gastronomic discomfort this morning. So, I apologize if he's ornery at lunch.
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