Forward Thinking

me: oh lol
me: look what I found
me: "string pattern = "200*.*"; // just this millenium, thanks"
me: its our 2k10 bug
me: I have no idea what that code does
me: but it doesn't anymore

[note: this conversation and code is from 2008]

Double Nerd Joke

Me, thinking: I'm making a note here.

Me, in Visual Studio: //HUGE SUCCESS

How Many Times Has This Happened to You?

Ed: hey, I got the info from Dave, working on it now, but I need to query DBLIVE to get the paymentIDs for the script... I don't have a user/pass that works for QA2
Jim: does orange/orange* get you there?
Ed: nope
Jim: k. give me a sec
Ed: k thanks
Jim: try banana/banana*
Jim: be careful. its read/write
Ed: ding
Ed: ok I will
Ed: drop database;
Ed: oops wrong window
Jim: f' you

*Passwords changed obviously.

Well, Is He?

I just got a wrong number by a 10 year old. Here was the entire conversation

Ed: Hello!
Kid: [background noise, voices]
Ed: Hello?
Kid: [pause] Hello?
Ed: Who's calling?
Kid: Is Ross there?
Ed: You have the wrong number.
Kid: [pause] Hello?
Ed: [angry] Hello?!
Ed's coworkers: [laughter]
Kid: Is Ross there?
Ed: You have the wrong number.
Kid: [background noises, voices]
Ed: [hangs up]

So I wrote a function to emulate his behavior:

public boolean IsRossThere() {
  string greeting = "Hello?";
  string query = "Is Ross There?";
  
  Phone.Say(greeting);
  If (Phone.Hear(anything) == True) {
    Phone.Say(query);
    If (Phone.Hear(yes) == false) {
      return this.IsRossThere();
    }
    Else {
      return true;
    }
  }
}

Funny All By Itself

Private Sub DoSearch()
  SetSearchParams()
  Me.LoadDataAsync() 'pray
End Sub